Is nothing sacred anymore?

Nothing saddens me more than finding out someone committed suicide.

As a practising psychologist I do my best to be there for my patients suffering with mental conditions and as a human being for loved ones who for some reason feel so desperate and depressed they can't move on.

But, there's Always another way. Sadly, in an increasingly lonely world, where social media fosters the idea and opportunity, everyone will be able to connect with someone 24/7, and find friends everywhere, what truly happens is that people forget to nurture deep relationships with physical friends and family.

For some reason, it becomes more important to follow some celebrity than focusing on the people that really matter in our lives. Celebrity status and living up to other people's expectations don't matter as much as being loved for who we are.

Not so long ago, a popular media celebrity committed suicide after repeated personal intrusions in their life to the extent they felt so desperate they couldn't find the strength to carry on. A young woman with her whole life ahead of her, family and friends. Sadly, this is a common situation and reflection of how little we know, if anything, about the people we see and hear about in the media. Household names are humans just like the rest of us. They cry and laugh and feel the same pain yet the glossy pictures and surroundings give a false insight into the person behind the glittering facade.

But WHO is the Person behind the glossy facade and frequently cruel scrutiny of the media and followers believing the hype surrounding them? Everyone has the right to keep something about themselves and their lives personal. Before the Internet and social media, famous public people were hounded and still are by the paparazzi even on holiday and when in company of other celebrities.  

The difference nowadays, is that so many subscribe to being part of social media. Influencers selling famous people's merchandise, taking selfies of themselves with celebrities and following their every move and posts.

How does all of it impact on our lives? Where do we draw the line between a personal life and one that fosters superficial connections?

IS NOTHING SACRED ANYMORE?

Whilst I appreciate the need to express feelings and post lovely pictures of someone who committed suicide on social media I also feel quite upset loving tributes and gestures are posted to attract followers. To me that's not right since it can be construed as exploiting a close friend and loved one.

Some things are private and ought to stay that way.

In this case, only ONE person, an ex-boyfriend, opted to shut down their social media for a period of time to get the time to grieve and come to terms with the tragedy. I so wish this had been the case with more people.

When someone we love and care about dies, instead of sharing posts about them what matters most is taking the time to feel and grieve and when the person's famous, we must respect the privacy of their closest and loved ones.

Ultimately, being there for someone who is vulnerable and helping them find a way forward while alive is what matters most.

Always talk to someone you trust, confide in a medical professional and Never think you can solve everything by yourself. Stay close to loved ones, surround yourself with the people who truly care about you and communicate your feelings.

Be your own best friend and supportive of the vulnerable people in your life.

With much love,

Hélene xx